As I go to sleep tonight at 12:30, having to wake at 6:30 again some of my friends and perhaps readers at large would expect me to be seriously upset with the election results. I'm not. Sure I'm disappointed but I'm not upset, angry, furious, or any other such adjective which denotes that I have taken offense in any personal way about the election results.
That is a huge personal change for me. A few years ago I sat in complete fear that the culture of death would take the White House and everything else with it. Tonight as I watched from start till bedtime with complete disconnect as my party of choice lost its seats I realized how much my mindset has changed since that night in a hotel room much like this one, sitting at the edge of my bed biting my nails.
In the past I have actively contributed to party efforts. I have donated money, blogged furiously on hot campaign issues, hung signs, and volunteered time. But not this year. Of course I still agree with Republicans on 90% of the issues and my votes do and will continue to reflect that as long as they believe what I do. But my heart is no longer with the party. It can't be because if it is then I must vote without loyalty to my conscience but to my hope in politicians doing what they promise. It means compromising and doing deals with the devil to gain an inch of ground here and lose a foot there.
As the psalm says: "Put not your trust in princes."... because all men fail us.
Realizing that my true party doesn't actually exist, expecting repression, and actually rejoicing somewhat in the living martyrdom which we must endure, our hope continues. We press on though a thousand may fall, ten thousand at our right - but us it will never approach.
Well thats enough for me tonight. I have a long day ahead of me tomorrow.
-pax et bonum-