"When God sends you tribulations, he expects you to tribulate!" -Mother Angelica
This virtue is probably the most unpopular, right next to "humility". But long-suffering is so unbelievably joyful while at the same time arduous and even sometimes depressing. Right now my living situation is not the ideal. At times I feel like I'm going nowhere with life. But I was compelled, I believe, to come back here to my little town.
For one thing, I was taken out of the business of the suburbs of Philadelphia. Removed from the fast pace and nastiness that every day life brings, I have been able to focus more on things that matter. I was a right mess in Philly in many ways. And although I enjoyed my time with friends (perhaps a bit too much) down there, I'll never move back lest the Spirit move me to do so. I enjoy visiting them but "that's all she wrote" on that one.
Living in NEPA is no picnic however. I have few friends left up here and those I have are either too busy or hermits themselves to participate regularly in vita socialis. I have zero Catholic friends. I have Christian friends of various denominations though, for whom I am really thankful to have. Single, bored, incurably religious, and in the woods is a good way to describe most of my days. Sounds serene doesn't it? But for reasons beyond the scope of this blogosphere, both financial and familial, I am called to live this life for this time. And I owe a lot to it.
For one, I never would have discovered the Church if not for "the quiet". God took me out of a place where the world around me was so chaotic and yes, Godless, so that I might discover my path in life. Not the goal, but the path. I have no idea where I'm being led. I just keep walking and trusting that what I'm doing is 'correct'. For that I am literally, eternally grateful.
So for right now, I'm waiting. This waiting is a blessed trial. I'm waiting for Confirmation. I have an approximate date for it (end of Feb, start of March??) but nothing set in stone. I'm waiting for my destination - single? marriage? religious life?? musician?? web designer forever?!? (please God no) I do know for sure that what I'm doing right now is only a bridge to whatever is next, which is a glimmer of Hope.